I see you.
Another bake sale.
Another birthday party.
Another sippy cup.
Another late night, school project.
But I see the real you.
The 4.0 GPA graduate.
The sex goddess.
The inner Danica Patrick.
The athlete.
The author.
Let me tell you something, self sacrifice is only admirable in Marvel movies. I mean, sure, if a serial killer gave you the option between saving yourself and saving your child the obvious choice is your little one. I get that, I would do the same thing. But I am not talking about that Quentin Tarantino-esque horror movie shit. I am talking about the SOUL sacrifice that so many of us do on a daily basis. With every cookie baked, every nose wiped, every handprint washed, a little bit of you goes missing. I implore you: do not sacrifice your soul for your family. Your life, maybe. But not your soul.
There is this running idea in the world that moms need to not only sacrifice ourselves for our children, but enjoy it too. Somehow wanting and desiring to be a woman AS WELL as a mom is wrong. How dare we! I think that shit is wack. I mean, we can only change so many shitty diapers and bake so many craft-sale cookies before we lose our mother f*cking minds AND souls. It isn't easy but it is important to find a little “you” in every day even if it is hard, even if it seems impossible. What did you love doing that you lost track of over the years? Was it volleyball or roller derby or sudoku puzzles or interior design? Remember that high you used to get and seek it out in whatever way you can. I think it is important for us to define ourselves in more than just “mom” and “wife” terms. Who are YOU separate from your family? Find her, nourish her, reclaim her. The more “you” you are, the more you are benefiting your family and the world. It is funny how that works. Nourishing YOU is not selfish.
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